What Peace Corps Means to Me: My Final PCV Blog

PREFACE: Here's who awaited and greeted me, with a big smile, in Sylvania, Ohio: my great-grandson, Philip! So precious! And his mom, my first-born grandchild Julia, and her mother, my daughter Elissa, and Julia's brother, Tony; and my grandkids Alli, Josh, Kyle, and their mom, my daughter Michelle, carrying a new grandson, Chase. A new family member is on the way! We live within a mile radius of each other, except for Tony finishing up school and finding his way in southern Ohio. I am home. I am "returned!" I am officially a RPCV, a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer. Can you believe it’s been two years? Philip was 2 years old when I left; now he is reading!

This is my final PCV blog. My Ukrainian adventure has come to an end, but not my Ukrainian experience, my stories, my memories. They will always be with me. They are a part of who I am. Now a new American adventure begins, and a new blog, "Life After Peace Corps.” I look forward to sharing more adventures on the journey we all share.

So here are some final thoughts on what the Peace Corps experience means to me. It’s been a life inspired, a life of purpose. Thanks, dear friends, for following my adventures and cheering me on. It’s been a team effort, that’s for sure!

A Life Inspired, A Life of Purpose: The Peace Corps Experience

When I began work at the public library in Starobelsk, a Russian-speaking village of about 18,000 in far-eastern Lugansk Oblast, Ukraine, I had a minor run-in with a librarian who thought all Americans were ignorant and arrogant. He went on for quite a while, to the embarrassment of the director, but I smiled and said I understood and it was okay. He ranted while I nodded amiably. It helped that I understood only every other word or so!

Near the end of my service, this librarian came up to me to say how much he has liked seeing me work with the Library. The English Club and the English-book collection have brought more people and new energy to the library, he said. He admitted, a bit sheepishly, that he had a bad view of Americans for a long time, especially while growing up, but now he sees we can be friends. I was the first American he had ever met. I responded with a big smile. “I am so glad we got to know each other!”

This is the essence of the Peace Corps experience. When we began our Peace Corps journey, many of us Community Development (CD) PCVs thought that using our skills and experiences in support of Ukrainian NGOs was the top priority, the number 1 goal. We were in Ukraine to be useful, to do good work, to transfer our skills. We embraced this goal with enthusiasm.

Now I think that the two other Peace Corps goals are equally important: getting to know a country and its people, and their getting to know us and America. On this level the Peace Corps experience is about modeling and mentoring good will, optimism, a “can-do” spirit, a positive but flexible attitude. It is about modeling how change can take place and mentoring some ways of achieving goals, one step at a time, from the bottom up.

What does this mean? For me it meant working with an NGO to address human rights abuses through a “Know Your Rights!”civic education project. It meant having fun with kids at a summer Camp, walking around with a globe, maps, and a dictionary, ever-ready to connect and instruct. It involved discussing history, poetry, folk traditions and holidays at English Club meetings. It meant engaging members in hands-on projects like making peace cranes, origami pumpkins, Halloween masks, holiday trees and cultural maps. It meant helping an artist write a cultural preservation grant to preserve the decorative paintings of the ancient Lugansk region. It involved attending seminars of the spoken word, celebrating the publication of a book, honoring local poets and local talents from the past and the present. It encompassed leading literature discussion seminars with English classes at the University, exploring American short stories by Jack London, Mark Twain, Kate Chopin, and Thomas Wolff.

Through all these activities, it was the connections that mattered most. The Peace Corps experience is about building bridges across cultures, and of course it's true: once a human connection is made, it's hard to sever. It feels good to connect on the level of human kindness, on a level that transcends differences. It’s wonderful to be a part of the daily life of a village: enjoying meals, many meals, and toasting to good health and good fortune; celebrating birthdays and holidays, and there are many in Ukraine; visiting a friend’s farm; attending programs at local schools and cultural centers; biking along village paths to go pick apples in fall; swimming in the river in summer, or relaxing on its tree-lined banks; joining friends on a vacation in Berdyansk on the Sea of Azov; traveling around the country; meeting friends like the incomparable Stefa and Bogdan in Lviv; and having tea, many cups of tea, in homes and cafes, getting acquainted, practicing a new language, developing trust and bonds of friendship.

All these activities, big and small, personal, work-related and social, inspire and energize the spirit, feed the soul. They strenghthen the foundation of grassoots change. They create brand new networks among people and organizations in the same village who had not connected before. They build lasting friendships. This was the essence of my Peace Corps experience for two years in the wonderful town of Starobelsk, Ukraine. I will always remember. Я буду всегда помнить.

Starobelsk Rocks: A New Freedom Movement in Ukraine

I think I recognize my friend Olga M at the far right. Starobelsk protests corruption, poverty, government intransigence ( photo from Gromadska Forum Lugansk).

Starobelsk, my wonderful town, is the center of a new freedom movement in Ukraine! The Tunisia/Egypt effect continues in eastern Europe. Change from the bottom up. Everyone thought it was impossible, but not me (not to be boastful). I saw the signs; I listened to the people; I witnessed the emergence of the future leaders of a democratic and thriving Ukraine. I knew it was just a matter of time.

The article below, from the Gromadsak Forum Lugansk (громадеький форум луканщини) tells the story: Starobelsk citizens staged a protest against the continuing corruption and injustice of the regime of President Victor Yanukovitch. Organized by "Patriotic Citizens of Ukraine," a grassroots coalition of concerned citizens, the protesters--brave warriors all--held signs protesting rising prices and taxes, the lack of government reform, ongoing political persecution, unemployment and growing poverty. A main slogan was "Freedom: Ukraine without Yanukovich." I am sure my friends were among the organizers and participants, thoughtful citizens, real "fighters for justice." Olga and Vera both told me one: "We are not afraid. We will fight for what is right." I believed them. I am so proud of my village and its thoughtful citizens. "Starobelsk rocks!" as my friend Yuliya wrote on facebook.

From Громадеький форум луганщини

Вчера в Старобельске возле «Дружбы» прошел митинг протеста против роста цен и тарифов, реформаторских усилий нынешней власти, которые ведут до обнищания большинства населения Украины. Об этом сообщает Параллель-медиа. Инициаторами митинга выступили патриотически настроенные граждане, представители различных политических сил и общественных организаций: «Партія Захисників Вітчизни», «НРУ», ВО «Свобода», «Спілка підприємців Старобільського району «Промінь» и другие. Основными лозунгами протестующих были «Азаров убийца базаров», «Азаров – Тигипко – нас имеют гибко!», «Мы за Украину без Януковича!», «Свободу політв’язням!», «Приймаємо партбілети ПР в утіль по 30 коп. за кг!» В ходе акции протеста была принята резолюция, в которой митинговальщики потребовали досрочной остановки полномочий Верховной Рады и Президента Виктора Януковича, продолжить мораторий на продажу земли сельскохозяйственного назначения на 5 лет, от депутатов ВР — личное голосование, ликвидация депутатской неприкосновенности, а также прекратить политические преследования, в частности, участников налогового майдана.

Goodbye, for now, DC!

DC spring scenes. Dupont Circle, my favorite neighborhood. Below right; a new Target store, Columbia Heights, an up-and-coming neighborhood around a new metro station, Howard and Don, hard to see, near flowers.

I am going home to Ohio tomorrow! It’s hard to believe I left Kyiv, Ukraine, on 9 February, and arrived in DC on 1 March, a little over a month ago. I had made a hasty trip from my COS conference in Slavsky back to Starobelsk to pack it up and say goodbye. My dear friend Natalia on Kyrova, with whom I was living, hosted a beautiful Paka Party, a bittersweet time for all of us. So hard to say goodbye. I considered myself a fulltime PCV, torn asunder from my village, my projects, and the many friends I had made over two years. It was a huge transition for which I wasn't prepared.

It was still winter in Ukraine, but I was looking forward to spring in Starobelsk, walking about town, through Lenin park, and reveling in Luba's and Natalia’s gardens. I was hoping to see the lilacs again, in such grand profusion everywhere, their scent perfuming the air, and the iris: that blessed time of year when Starobelsk becomes “a lavender world.” It’s a time I described in a blog exactly one year ago, one that Loren loved; we reminisced about the lilacs in Rochester, NY where we grew up. It was one of the last blogs Loren read and we discussed together, and it will always be special to me for that reason. He told me he loved the color lavender.

Spring has unfolded slowly and inexorably in DC since I’ve been here, and my perspective along with it. It has eased the transition back to the States, and the realization that I would not be returning to Ukraine. Spring somewhat cushioned the sadness. I've had a gazillion doctors’ appointments, and all the medical issues are resolved. Almaz and Laura W at Peace Corps headquarters were a terrific help. I’ve walked around Georgetown, downtown, Foggy Bottom, Dupont Circle, all beautiful, vibrant neighborhoods. I’ve had lovely lunches and dinners with friends; spent time with Rita, a group 36er, and other PCVs who are staying at the elegant (for PCVs) Georgetown Suites for a variety of medical issues, none critical it seems to all of us. Most of us come to view it as a vacation, after the initial shock of being here wears off. Most of us will return to our sites, like Emily, now back in China, Amy in Ecquador, Brent, back in Azerbaijan, and Sarah, on her way back to the mountains of Peru.

In my case, however, I will not go back. My PC service is officially at an end. Tomorrow, Tuesday, I take the train to my new home in Sylvania. Somehow the transition I'm making from St. Petersburg, Florida to Ohio, moving all my material stuff, doesn't seem as difficult as the transition from PCV to RPCV, moving around the mental stuff and getting it sorted out and organized. DC has given me some time to start the process, and for that I am grateful.

So goodbye, for now, DC. I'll be back, maybe when my PCV friend Jud gets settled in here. He's arriving 29 May he just told me; it buoyed my spirits just to know that. I hope I can return to Ukraine someday, too, or host friends here in the states. Who knows where life will take us, but I will take life as it comes.

It's Not about Spending, It's about Values

This is a SAMPLE federal budget from Pew research foundation. I thought it was interesting and a way to start thinking about the whole shebang.

The fight over the budget is not about spending. It’s not about “reining in” government, and the deficit. It’s not about “fiscal responsibility.” It is about values.

If it was about spending, we would all be taking a hard look at the largest parts of our budget, where cuts would really matter. What programs are we cutting, and why? How will that help the overall budget? What items are we NOT cutting, and why? What about those tax loopholes for the wealthiest Americans and huge corporations like Haliburton, who pay no taxes? What about the tremendous “welfare for the rich” programs that seem to be held sacrosanct? Even Warren Buffet and Bill Gates talk about this, and with more sophistication than our current legislators. What about the billions we give to dictators who line their own pockets and stomp on economic and political freedoms for their people, and the wars in Irag, Afghanistan and now in other countries? How effective are our very expensive post- 9/11 national security programs, and what about them?

If this “debate’ was really about cutting government spending, the so-called “negotiations” wouldn’t be getting “stuck” on funding for planned parenthood, cancer screening for women, medical research, the defense of marriage act, or NPR.

So we are down to the nitty gritty: the Republicans want to “rein in” government spending for the middle class, the working poor, women, kids, the sick, disabled, and elderly. They do not want to rein in government for the rich. Obama ran on the opposite platform, that government has a role to play in our lives. Why isn’t he jumping on this, and the fact that the economic problems we face stem from the riotous deficit spending policies of the Bush/Cheney administration. Where were the tea party zealots then? The president and his economic advisers would do well to educate the American people about the real issues and the real options. I think this is a huge gap in the Obama administration’s handling of this crisis, and of its handling of economic issues in general.

And finally, if this “debate” was about "spending," wouldn’t you think twice about the COST of closing down the government, then re-booting it, no matter where you are on the political spectrum? Would you be yelling with glee "Shut it down," when that will cost taxpayers money and hurt not help the economy? Is this like destroying a village in order to save it? If you really want to cut spending, does this make sense? But, and here's the heart of the matter, is this argument making a dent? Do the know-nothings who are refusing to compromise (on things like women's health) care? Doesn’t look like it. And that’s the real story.

Zealots who don't care about our Government

If the government shuts down, so will Peace Corps headquarters. This will mean a skeletal crew there, and no work getting done. It might mean that my trip home will be delayed, and more egregious, that PCVs all over the world will not get their meager allowances. It’s small potatoes, but it’s the trickle down effect of a government shutdown.

The only good thing for some of us PCVs on medevac is that we are ‘stuck’ in Washington. The government’s a mess, but the city is beautiful. We can enjoy the unfolding spring, the cherry blossoms, the greening of trees, nice sunsets, and good friends. My daughter Elissa went back to Ohio on Tuesday, but we had a nice dinner at an outdoor Harbourside restaurant the night before with friends Howard and Don. These are the small joys of being in DC.

Outside of that, there is the drama of politics at its lowest level. America is in the grip of an ideological minority who doesn’t care about consequences, who care only about pushing their agenda. That agenda involves cuts in education, arts, cancer research, NPR, medicare quarantees for seniors, programs for workers and the working poor. Their drastic cutting doesn't of course include tax cuts for the richest Americans and corporations who don't pay anything. Just the opposite: they extend tax breaks for the wealthiest Americans and tax breaks for large corporations.

“Shut it down,” a tea party Republican screams gleefully at a tea party rally outside the capitol. “Shut it down!”

Isn’t this great? A lawmaker who doesn’t care. What responsible lawmaker would want this? Just shut the government down? “My way or the highway?” Why doesn’t Obama jump on this outrageous behavior? Call it for what it is: protecting the wealthy, screwing the middle class, workers, the poor. This is not about “reining in government spending.” This is about the arrogance of right-wing zealots who don’t care about the US government at all. It’s truly appalling.

Economic Chaos

It’s ironic that the nation’s capital is greening into a lacey lime green while the federal government is “de-greening,” to the point of shutting down. A few characters and ignorant ideologues with “grandiose” illusions have added to the melodrama. Our elected representatives are running roughshod over the will and voice of ordinary Americans. It’s as if we are not even here. They will run the government as they see fit, and the rest of us be damned. The common good be damned. It is so annoying and frustrating that I am beginning to feel like an Arab in one of the Middle East countries run by vicious tyrants that we supported for over 30 years.

At least the government is still running even in Ukraine, I told a PCV friend. HAH, was the somewhat frivolous response. “The Ukrainian government doesn’t have to ‘shut down,’ because it doesn’t ‘run’ in the first place.” Goodness, what’s the world coming to.

People are yearning for self-determination while politicians, worse among them in our Congress the tea party Republicans, treat us as if we are in the way. That’s the untold, unexplored connection between our domestic policies and our dysfunctional foreign policies. I suppose the first step is exposing these weaknesses and the nature of the problem. That is being done now with painful clarity, like unpeeling the layers of an onion rotten to the core.

How callous can one be to think that closing down the government is going to do anything but hurt a lot of people. I am thinking we need to put Bill Clinton in charge of the economy. We have no coherent domestic economic policy. As far as I can see, all Obama’s economic advisers have let him down, and the rest of us, too. There needs to be a leader at the head of the economic ship of state. We don’t have one now, and we are descending into economic chaos made worse by ideologues who are “know nothings” and won’t compromise. Does any sane person think defunding NPR and other “nickel and dime” programs , like student aid or peace corps, are going to solve our economic crisis? Give me a break! Whether the government shuts down or not, our Congress and president have some problem solving to do to get the entire government on track. I can't see a bunch of ignorant minority right-wing ideologues derailing the whole American government as if it were a lego set on the stage of a billionaire's yacht.

Moving On

My next move: a new apartment on the second floor of this old house in downtown Sylvania, Ohio, photo by new neighbor Robin C, and flick photo below by AR Avaritti.

I am nearing the end of my DC medical visit. It’s been great being in DC, a good transition back to the States, but it's as if time has been suspended. I've been in the waiting room long enough! Time for something to happen. The surgery went well. I am AOK! My daughter Elissa was a great help, a blessing. This week I have a few more follow-up appointments with my surgeon (more than I wanted) and my final Close of Service medical appointments, and then I will be going home, to a new home, in Sylvania, Ohio.

My Peace Corps service has come to an end. It happened a bit too fast for me, and it’s a hard adjustment, but I am ready to resettle. I am going into the unknown again, not sure what awaits me, not sure what I want to do. I will feel my way forward, like I did in Starobelsk, but with more ease, flexibility, and life lessons under my belt. I think I’m more relaxed with life as it comes.

I now have attachments I never thought I’d have, attachments to Ukraine, the culture, the people. It will always be a part of who I am, a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer. How blessed I am. So I will make a new home in Sylvania, Ohio, near my daughters and grandkids; get my stuff moved up from St. Petersburg, Florida; settle in and settle down.

I will lighten up my load in the process, get rid of furniture and stuff I have accumulated over the years. I have found that I really don’t need much in the way of material things. A bed, a table, a lamp, some books. I grew to enjoy living in one room. It was all I needed. I felt comfortable in a room in a house, sharing space and meals and life in general. I am not sure where my next adventure might take me. I want to keep learning, exploring, stretching.

I am moving on. Also, a new blog, My Post-Peace Corps Life, will emerge shortly, after I'm settled in Sylvania!

Food!

Fresh from the garden, many wonderful meals with friends, with loving attention to detail and great generosity; Luba's Easter bread and colored eggs; 12-dish Christmas eve dinners; growing , preparing, and celebrating food.

Well, I have gained about 10 pounds since being back in the States. What’s going on? It must have something to do with the American vs the Ukrainian diet.

In Ukraine, a meal starts with a bowl of soup, often borscht, the tomato,chicken or meat-based vegetable, potato and cabbage soup, sometimes made with beets, sometimes not. There’s a green variety of Borscht, too. I also like the chicken soup, strong chicken stock and lots of fresh vegetables with potatoes or noodles. After soup comes a helping of meat, a beef patty, fried liver or pork, a piece of chicken, served with potatos fixed in a variety of ways (boiled, mashed, fried). Other times we have vareneky (dumplings) or perogies (a kind of ravioli), a little fish, or stuffed peppers, which I love, especially Luba's. Valya and Nicolai make homemade chicken kielbasa (sausage), the best I ever had.

Accompanying this course, always, is a salad of some kind, picked fresh from the garden most of the year--tomatoes, onions, cucumbers, dill, garlic, peppers, eggplant, squash, carrots, and lovingly preserved mushrooms or pickles. Fresh-baked bread is a staple. The food is not overly spicey but tasty. All natural. My host moms, Valya in Chernigov, Luba and Natalia in Starobelsk, pride themselves on their fresh and natural cooking. Meals are nutritious and delicious. After dinner, a cup of tea, sometimes with dessert, cookies or cake (tort).

There are special holiday meals, too. On Christmas eve (рождественский вечер),which in Ukraine is 6 January, a beautifully set table (the best china and glasses come out of the cabinet)is filled with twelve dishes, representing the 12 apostles, and also 12 months of the year, for the more secular. The 12 dishes include the best variety of salads ever, special plates of pickled fruits, mushrooms, and eggplant; carrot salad, crab and corn salad (a favorite), beet salad, sausages and cheeses. At Easter there is special Paska bread (паска хлеб)and colored, often intricately decorated, eggs, some to fill an Easter basket to take to church to be blessed by the priest. Sumptuous and bountiful meals mark parties, birthdays, anniversaries, local and national holidays (and there are many). Of course there are grand and frequent toasts, with vodka or cognac, sometimes wine, but always with lots of food, gusto, and laughs. I’m not a great cook, but I had the best meals in Ukraine. That's probably because I hardly ever cooked, truth be told. And we rarely if ever went to restaurants in Starobelsk

What am I eating here? I’m having hamburgers and french fries (trying to limit the latter). I’m eating prepared foods, sandwiches and frozen meals, a bit heavy on beef dishes, maybe because I didn’t have a lot in Ukraine, some but not a lot. I think the portions are larger. Not good. In the morning, bagels and a bowl of cereal go down with two to three cups of coffee, with lots of sugar and milk. I’m eating more carbs, overall. In Ukraine, breakfast is usually whatever is left over from supper the night before, a little meat, vegetables, bread. I even got used to having liver in the morning. And no harm done. Lots of good restaurants in DC, too, and I'm taking advantage of them.

Okay, I see it now. Я панимаю. I understand. I ate more balanced meals in Ukraine, more natural, and healthier portions overall, than I am eating here in the States. It didn’t take long to fall back into old habits. No fresh vegetables from the garden, or from the storage cellar prepared for the winter months, or from street vendors, roadside stands, or the ever-lively bazaar, where you could always buy fresh produce from other people’s gardens.

In Ukraine you could buy produce from lots of small stores and shops, too, or the new “supermarkets” that are opening everywhere, but they are not as loaded as our giant foodstores. The selections are much smaller. Stores here are overstocked with pricey canned, frozen or preserved foods that have few nutrients but lots of calories. And there are so many choices. I was overwhelmed, when I first got back, at the many kinds of cereal to choose from; I must have spent 20 minutes just starring at the different boxes, all offering heart health and good nutrition. It was confusing, so I finally just went for the corn flakes.

When I get settled into my new home in Sylvania, Ohio, I’m going to have to pay more attention to what I am eating. This waiting around for appointments, going back and forth to Peace Corps headquarters, and seeing friends is wonderful, but it is leaving me too much free time to snack. How easy to get off balance. Things I got used to in Ukraine, living for two years with wonderful gardeners and cooks besides, are no longer an option, unless I live on a farm. I am going to have to think about my diet again. It’s my first lesson in post-Peace Corps living.

Cheer up, Ukraine. Spring is on the way!

The greening and flowering of Washington continues in spite

of colder weather we've had recently. I love the cherry blossoms and pansies, and I was thrilled to spot some pink camellias next to a downtown office building.

Cheer up, Ukraine. Don't despair. Spring is forcing its way into Washington, and it will do the same in Ukraine. It’s been cool here for a few days, too, down to the 30s, but that hasn’t stopped the greening and flowering of trees and bushes. Nor has sleet and snow. Yes, we had a little snow. Howard, Don and I walked to breakfast Saturday morning wrapped up in wool hats, gloves and scarves. Still the flowers are blooming. I thought it was warmth that brought out the flowers. But I think it’s as much longer days as warmer days. The cool weather has slowed things down a bit, but the process is inexorable: it's like watching a tree blooming in slow motion. Once spring starts, it doesn’t stop. What a wonderful lesson from nature in persistence!

This is to reassure my friends in Ukraine, where winter lingers. "I've had it with winter," a PCV friend admitted. "It's gloomy," said another. "Our winter too long this year," Vera emailed me. But really, Spring IS on the way. As soon as the daffodils and forsythia and apricot trees start to bloom in Starobelsk, it won’t stop there. Luba, Valya, Tonya and Natalia will be able to get back to their gardens. I know they can't wait. Nothing brings Luba more pleasure. So hang in there Ukraine. Spring comes to all of us; rebirth is insistent, persistent, and universal. All we have to do is wait.

So I offer this hope, a shorter version, in Russian as well!

Весна заставляет свой путь в Вашингтон. Она былапрохладной в течение нескольких дней, вплоть до 30-х годов, но это не остановило озеленение и цветение деревьев и кустарников. Я думал, что это тепло, чтовывел цветы. Но я думаю, что это как гораздо большедней, как теплые дни. прохладная погода замедлилвещи вниз немного, но это сделано весной лучше вкаком-то смысле. Как смотреть дерево расцветает взамедленном движении. Как только начинается весна, это не останавливает. Этозамечательный урок упорства. Это олжно успокоитьмоих друзей в Украине, где зима задерживается. Веснауже в пути. Как только нарциссы и Форсития иабрикосовые деревья начинают цвести, она не будетостанавливаться на достигнутом. Люба, Валя, Тоня иНаталья смогут вернуться в свои сады. Слава дней!Весна наступает для всех нас. Возрождение не толькоуниверсальным, настойчивый, настойчивый. Все, что нам нужно сделать, это ждать.

Longevity and Doubt

Flickr photos right.

Elizabeth Taylor just died, at 79 years of age. Now we learn that Geraldine Ferraro, Walter Mondale's vice-presidential running mate in 1984, died. I grew up with Liz Taylor, and Geraldine Ferraro was a favorite politician and pioneer, so these feel like personal losses. I feel this way about every artist, author and famous person that marked and enriched my life. I felt sad when Frank Sinatra died, and Paul Newman; when historians John Hope Franklin and Howard Zinn died; and Walter Conkrite and Lena Horne.

They were among the great signposts of an era, an integral part of the cultural fabric of my life. Thread by thread, the cultural fabric is unraveling.

My sister Andy and I talk about it; this must be one of the hard things about a long life . Everyone starts leaving. The signposts go down. The cultural markings are obliterated. The icons are dismantled.The familiar is replaced by the new and the strange.

Howard, Don and I talked about it at breakfast this morning. "When you are born, you are doomed," Howard said graphically, "to an inevitable ending." Don told of a great aunt, his grandmother's sister, who lived to 95 until a fall sent her to a nursing home, and to her inevitable end. She outlived everyone.

So has our Aunt Loretta, my mother’s sister, who at 94 is doing remarkably well 'for her age.' She still smokes, but what the heck, God love her. She's outlived everyone in our family but her cousin Bill in Columbus, including her two children, our cousins Maria and Skip, and her sister, our beloved mom. It’s been tragic, and yet she is resilient, and stubborn. I think the latter helps as much as the former. But I wonder about longevity. I wonder about living in a world of shrinking relations and continual loss. There must be some way to come to terms with endings, but I find it hard. I’ve struggled with this dilemma with my brother’s death. "But, Fran, he died doing what he loved, on a hike with friends, and quickly. No lingering painful illness. He was spared a too-long life."

"A too-long life." That's what I'm wondering about. And the alternative, " a too-short life." And on top of that, an afterlife. Maybe this is why I'm thinking about volunteering with Hospice when I get up North, although this, too, is up in the air, so to speak.

Actually, I’m finding I have less faith in some afterlife, or eternal life of the soul, than I thought. I’m thinking endings are endings, not beginnings. Howard and Don think so too. I know Loren would argue with us about this. On the other hand, maybe human beings need this belief in an afterlife of some kind to console the soul in the face of death. Maybe this faith that cushions endings and losses is worth hanging onto, whether you believe in it or not, whether you meet the angel of death, the grim reaper, at 75 or 95 years of age. Maybe. Who knows? Who among the dead can enlighten us? Goodbye Liz and Geraldine. Hello doubt.

Peace Corps Resource Center

Right: Rita and Amy, African artifacts at PC Resource Center, magnolia tree on the way; below and above, DC rooftops

I spent the afternoon at the Peace Corps Resource Center (PCRC) in Rosslyn, VA today. It’s a good sized office with a room full of computers, printers, scanners, fax and phones. It has a library of useful brochures and information. Amy, a RPCV (Returned Peace Corps Volunteer) who served in Azerbajan, greeted my PCV Ukraine friend Rita and me. We had a little tour, noticed the great wall posters and photos and displays of artifacts, mostly from Africa, and spent time at the computers.

The Peace Corps offers many benefits to RPCVs, and the Resource Center is there to help. These include employment counseling and job placement support ; noncompetitive eligibility for government jobs; extended health benefits for 18 months after service; and terrific education and graduate school opportunities, especially great for young volunteers, most of whom are recent college graduates or just a few years out of college.

Graduate school opportunities are fantastic. Scholarships, academic credits and stipends are available from PC “partners.” PC has more than 100 partnerships with schools from Boston U to Tulane to Northern Arizona University. These are unique opportunities to combine the experience of PC service with a graduate degree. I know several volunteers from my group 36 in Ukraine who plan to take advantage of these programs.

Getting to Rosslyn and back to Georgetown was half the pleasure. It was a rainy day, in the 50s, not warm, but many trees are in full bloom, the white and pink cherry trees and the magnificent magnolia trees pretty against a gray sky. We also saw lots of full forsythia bushes at their peak. Clouds of yellow in some places. I love the way spring moves from yellow and pink to red and purple, from daffodils and cherry blossoms to brighty tulips and iris. I can see why artists of all ages and places found the season irresistible, took out their brushes, and filled their canvases.

I also discovered it’s easy to take the new “Connector” buses from Georgetown to Rosslyn, easier, faster, and cheaper than a regular bus or the metro. So that was a good experience, too. Along the way I stopped to see my friend Esther at the Federation of State Humanities Councils, because it turned out the office was just down the street from the PC Resource Center. The degrees of separation between people around the globe seems to get smaller and smaller.

It’s a pink and yellow world in the nation's capital now, which makes these explorations a pleasure. It's the little things in life that matter sometimes. Not that our global anxieties are far from our thoughts, but that the beauty that surrounds us, and the little adventures we take, keep our spirits up.

Peace Cranes and Peace Elusive

Below photo of English Club: "Peace Cranes," colonel.korn flickr photostream.

We made peace cranes at the English Club once to thank Judy’s class in Virginia for contributing to a Peace Corps Partnership Grant that helped the Starobelsk Library build it’s first English books collection. My Peace Corps service is ending, but those books will last forever, a legacy made possible by American friends who care.

Now I’m thinking we need these peace cranes for the huge idea they symbolize: peace in the world. Dreamers have long tried to end wars, to find substitutes for war, to no avail. Perhaps there’s something about aggressive human nature that makes war unavoidable. Perhaps war is a prelude to peace, showing how worthless violence and killing are. But at what a cost? And what have we learned?

My brother Loren thought it had to do with patriarchy. Where strong men rule, where cultures worship them, make them heads of state, leaders, heroes and warriors, there also wars take place. Loren believed the dominance of patriarchy needed to be balanced with the presence of the goddess, with female spirituality. Without this balance, violence and war are inevitable. It’s looking that way now.

Moammar Gadhafi’s hold on power in Libya, long after the Lockerbee disaster, many UN resolutions, and a rebel uprising against his rule, is one of several contemporary examples of senseless ruthlessness and violence in the face of the people’s yearnings for self-determination. Bombing defenseless people in the streets? Killing innocent civilians? Unbelievable, yet he did it. Ruling with an iron fist and lining his own pockets with millions of dollars while the majority of people live in poverty? Yes, he is guilty, just like the former dictators in Egypt and Tunisia, all dictators we once supported in our long-established, woefully misguided foreign policy. Same with other dictators we support in Yemen, Bahrain, and even Saudi Arabia.

Should we be in Libya, a third war? Fact is we are in there, big time, hoping other western nations, and also the Arab League, in an unprecedented action, will support it, and take the lead. This sounds implausible, but who knows? It started with a UN resolution 1973, according to President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. It's about "stopping Gadhafi from killing his own people" we are hearing, over and over.

But what is the political, economic and social situation in Libya, the historical context? Who ARE the supporters of Gadhafi? Who are the rebels? Is it a tribal situation, or religious sectarianism, like in Iraq? Why is Libya different from Yemen and Bahrain, where the people are also exploding against their despots, and confronting brutal repression.

Regime change? No-fly zone? US cruise missiles hitting key cities and sites along the Libyan coast? Is this international intervention? What mission are these tactics supporting? Where will this lead? Where will it end? What is our appropriate role?

Loren would say we need some balancing force to emerge. But what might that be? Without Loren's take on this, I can only imagine. I imagine the best hope is for a quick end to this new war, which for the US should be neither an "odyssey" nor a "dawn"(an unfortunate and rather tortuous name for this supposedly quick operation that we will turn over to others soon).

I imagine some balance coming from a limited form of human intervention and a large form of divine intervention, mostly the later. I imagine the rebels getting organized to take over their own country. I imagine Gadhafi fleeing, soon, into dictator purgatory, pursued by over 1,000 peace cranes.

For a story about the origins of peace cranes see : http://www.buddhistcouncil.org/bodhitree/Books/Story_of_the_Peace_Crane.pdf

For a Buddhist peace site, The Bodhi Tree: http://www.buddhistcouncil.org/bodhitree/Introduction.htm#_top

A robin and the moon

Sunday, 19 March 2011

I saw my first robin of the season today as I walked through the park between Georgetown and Dupont Circle. The flowering trees and bushes are ahead of the robin sighting, but I almost jumped with glee. I wanted to call Loren to tell him about it, then remembered, dejectedly, that Loren is not here, not on earth to enjoy this change of seasons, this annual rebirth.

I long to hear his voice, to have him tell me about spring in Tallahassee, which he and our sister Andy shared and loved. At the very first sign of spring, Andy heads straight to her garden. Loren went straight to a nature trail to hike. I see him hiking now, in the grassy meadows, along the Aucilla river, at St. Marks’ Wildlife Refuge, with friends from the Tallahassee Trails Association.

On the way home from Dupont Circle that evening I saw the full moon shining brilliantly over stately Victorian buildings. I stood still for a long time. The silence of the moon. I thought it was shining brighter than usual, closer than usual, as bright and close as the lights lining the streets. It was, indeed, a "supermoon" I learned later on a weather report.

If it's a supermoon Loren must see it too, I thought, I hoped, although my hope is stronger than my faith. The brightness of this moon must touch his soul, somehow. I want to believe this, with all my heart. I want to believe that the lightness of his being was reflected in the light of this full moon.

Is the world unraveling?

Saturday afternoon, 19 March, a bright spring day: Libya has knocked Japan right out of the news. The U.S. fired over 100 cruise missiles on Libyan targets, the headlines scream. I’m not even sure what this means. Doesn’t this place us right in the heart of a war? Where is the so-called “broad international coalition”? And if Gadhafi is digging in his heels, doesn’t this mean we are in for a prolonged conflict in northern Africa, kind of how we got into Iraq, going after Saddam Hussein, 8 years ago?

Underneath this horrendous news ran this banner: Japanese radiation spreading, reaching California. Meanwhile, Japan is still reeling from the effects of the massive earthquake and tsunami, thousands killed, thousands still missing. A war and a disaster. Unbearable catastrophe.

Most of us are far away from the sound and fury of these natural and man-made disasters. Here on a bright sunny spring day in the nation’s capital, life seems serene, benign. It’s hard to imagine the depth and extent of the crises and the human suffering.

The bad news is so bad I don’t know how the journalists are deciding which is more newsworthy. It doesn’t look like any of these events, neither the spread of nuclear radiation nor the spread of war, will end soon. They will linger in reality and in the news for a long time. Good lord, what next?

Taking in the "Now," Again

Photos: A Slavsky Road (Carpathian mountains, Ukraine); an Iris in Starobelsk.

The One for Whom You Create
Poets, lose your pens,
Painters, toss your brushes
in the sea,
Musicians, give your instruments
away,
then go for a long walk.

When you're done,
keep walking,
notice the beauty all around you.
Don't try to remember
a single thing,
breathe.

This holy moment is your poetry,
your art, your song.
Do not concern yourself with giving it form.

From Mitch Ditkoff’s Blog, Heart of the Matter

This is a nice poem, found by accident on a blog called Heart of the Matter. Sounds like Deepak Chopra or Eckhart Tolle. As usual I struggle with the concept. I have some qualms about the message of this poem. I think this is taking the “NOW” to the extreme. Sure we breathe and take in the moment. We go for long walks and notice the beauty around us. We are grateful for the moment.

But do we want to breathe in a world without poetry, music, art? I have experienced many “a holy moment” in reading the poetry of Mary Oliver, listening to Bach or the Beatles, admiring the paintings of Frieda Kahlo, Georgia O’Keefe, Picasso, the sculpture of David Smith. I, for one, am glad that these artists and every artist on earth in all times and places have concerned themselves “with giving it form.”

Okay, I might be off base here. I’m open to suggestions. I welcome your insights. But now I will take a long walk, from Georgetown to the National Cathedral, and breath in the moment.

PCVs in DC: Kindred Spirits

Top collage: Peace Corps Headquarters; cherry blossoms; Emily relaxing in our Georgetown suite. Below: Georgetown scenes and PCVs Amy, Claire, Brent, Ina and Emily at dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant.

I am adjusting to being in DC rather than in Ukraine. First I felt torn from my site, lonely for Starobelsk. I missed my friends. I still miss my friends. I even miss being surrounded by the Russian language.

But Washington is my old hometown. I’m strolling familiar streets and sites, seeing some friends, reconnecting with a place that was home for almost 20 years.

It’s been interesting going back and forth to Peace Corps headquarters at 22nd and L, NW, from Georgetown to downtown. It's a rather nondescript, typical DC office building. It’s architecture is plain compared to PC headquarters in Ukraine, but serviceable, lots of offices with serious government workers, and tons of security just to get in. There have been lots of appointments at the office and also at nearby doctor’s offices. I’m lucky. My tests have gone okay and show no serious issues, no cancer. I’m very fortunate.

It’s also been nice to share a room at the Georgetown Suites with another PCV. Emily is a TEFL volunteer in Southeastern China. She’s one of 200 English teachers there, all concentrated in Eastern China. She’s really here for no good reason and just trying to get back to Hong Guang, which is near Chengdu, the capital of Sichuan province. We know it as Sechuan, and for its spicy cuisine. Chengdu was the capital of China 2000 years ago; the site of a technological miracle that diverted a river to irrigate the plains in 800 AD (which the Communist tried but could not duplicate) and, more recently, in 2008, near the site of the devastating earthquake that decimated an elementary school and killed thousands.

The University where Emily teaches was established because Chairman Mao stood on the site, spotted a tractor in a field, and announced there should be a university there to build tractors. So the school went up. Apparently Mao walked about China like this, seeing things, making pronouncements, and then seeing them come to life. This was when Mao was considered a “spiritual leader," and what he said was law. There is no “spiritual leader” in China today, Emily says, just power grabs between civilian and military leaders, a situation that complicates internal stability and international relations. Emily thinks China’s political and economic situation is precarious and that some kind of crisis is looming. This is somewhat contrary to what we hear and read about China rising, so I was fascinated by this “insider’s” view.

When I asked Emily what value the Chinese prized the most, she said “harmony.” Sounded nice. ”But not how we think of it,” she added quickly. “It has more to do with maintaining the status quo, not rocking the boat, than maintaining harmonious relations among different peoples. In fact they value ‘harmony’ at the expense of human relations, the latter not a priority at all,” she believes. Harmony as a form of oppression, she said. Interesting. The ying and yang of harmony, although Emily might take issue with this, too.

There are other volunteers here in DC, for various medical issues, none serious it seems. Claire is a Youth Development volunteer working with special needs kids in Peru. After PC she wants to get a PhD in psychology and work with people with autism. Ina is a volunteer in Antiqua, lives on the beach, speaks English. We tease her about it: it’s a hardship post, but someone’s got to do it. Amy is in Hondurus and Brent in Armenia. We’re all over the map and we enjoyed sharing stories, mostly hilarious, over dinner at an Ethiopian restaurant.

PCVs are a pretty laid back bunch, mostly young (unless it’s a big PCV country like Ukraine), take things in stride, funny and somewhat irreverent. They have interesting takes on the countries they serve and on their own country. They are open, tolerant, and have wide-ranging interests.

So the Peace Corps experience continues in new and different ways. Once a PCV, always a PCV. It’s a fascinating community of kindred spirits, no matter where you are.

Springtime Connections

l Collage featuring Taras Shevchenko statue and bouquet of flowers; Annex of Phillips Collection; Suzanne and me in front of Ghandi statue.

Washington is turning green. Well, it IS St. Patrick's Day. We're all Irish today, and it feels right! Every bar in DC is celebrating. Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Spring is coming to Washington, so I imagine it unfolding in Ukraine. The trees are budding, the bushes leafing, the forsythia popping, the daffodils blooming, the cherry blossoms are blushing pink. I see what is here and now, and I think Ukraine. It will be like this for the rest of my life, I think, maybe especially in Spring, so welcome after a long hard winter. It was exciting to see the daffodils along Panfelova and the paths into town,the apricot trees in Luba’s yard, the tulips around the university, the Kaston (chestnut trees) in Lenin park, the iris and lilacs everywhere, in profusion. A palette of yellow, purples, lavender, and pink.

On Saturday I walked to the Philips Collection, a favorite art museum, to meet my friend Suzanne, enjoying the fresh air, savoring Spring. We toured the museum, saw an exhibit of works by David Smith, a favorite sculptor, and posed in front of the statue of Mahatma Gandhi across the street. We had lunch and talked politics, just like old times.

On my way back to the hotel I saw another beautiful statue and was moved by some unknown energy to take a closer look. There on the corner of P Street and Massachusetts NW stood Taras Shevchenko, the Ukrainian poet! That elegant statue has always been there, but this is the first time I really saw it, the first time it spoke to me. A love of everything Ukraine enveloped me, like it did Shevchenko, and I felt a love for that country that has been my home for two years. A fresh bouquet of flowers adorned the base of the statue, a gift from the Embassy of Ukraine. Shevchenko looked approvingly at the blue and yellow bouquet that symbolized Ukrainian culture and history, the colors of the Ukrainian flag.

Springtime Washington. Springtime Ukraine. The connection’s never been so strong, so beautiful!

"An endless scream passing through nature"

The cherry blossoms are weeping. Japan is suffering one of the worst natural disasters of modern times, a huge earthquake that triggered a mind-bending tsunami that has destroyed northern coastal cities such as Sendai, a once-lovely city of one million, considered Japan's "greenest" city (photo montage, below right, Wikipedia). Nature’s fury unleashed. We are powerless in the face of it. The destruction is unimaginable. It's like watching the twin towers crumble after the terrorist attacks of 9/11. I know it's not the same, but I feel that same sense of helplessness and horror.

It's how the painter Edvard Munch felt when he witnessed a blood-red sunset in Norway caused by the ultra-massive explosion of Indonesia's Krakatoa Volcano and a resultant devastating tsuanmi that totally wiped out this far-away island in 1883. This natural disaster was the source of his famous painting, "The Scream." I never knew this before, that a monster disaster, an explosion heard and seen round the world over 100 years ago, inspired this painting. “Suddenly the sky turned blood red,” Munch recalled. “I stood there shaking with fear and felt an endless scream passing through nature” (quoted in Wikipedia).

I was glued to the TV for several hours, then turned it off. Did I detect a hint of glee in the reporters’ coverage, an earth-shattering event that was good for the news. Somehow I think the news stations like these disasters. It brings millions to the tube. It goes on for days and days. Breaking news. Breaking news. Disaster. Death. Destruction.

Maybe I am being overly sensitive. Afterall, we do want to know what’s happening. But 24/7 for days on end? This is what I am not sure about. Perhaps the best thing is that the overkill news coverage mobilizes disaster relief. Japan helped Louisiana after Katrina, and joined other nations in helping Haiti after the earthquake, and now these nations will help Japan, along with humanitarian organizations and caring individuals hearing the horrifying news.

“An endlress scream passing through nature,” a horrific natural disaster made worse by nuclear meltdowns and a rising death toll. Another Chernobyl, another Hiroshima and Nakasake, loom. Massive radiation contamination. An unending crisis, one on top of the other. We pray for Japan, for the people lost, for the survivors of these families who grieve surrounded by nothing but rubble, destruction, a flooded wasteland, and now nuclear fallout. Some things are beyond understanding. The cherry blossoms are weeping.

Musings 3: Turnings

Turning points, flickr photo.

I'm having another turning in my life. I turn 71 today. Amazing grace! Last year I turned 70 in Toledo, Ohio, when I was visiting my family to celebrate the turning from one decade to the next. The English Club had a surprise 70th birthday party for me when I got back to Starobelsk (photo, below right). I thought I’d be turning 71 in Starobelsk, too, but it didn’t happen that way. A turning, and I am in Washington, DC.

It seems like everything turns. The seasons turn. Our lives turn, like the old soap opera, “As the World Turns.” Maybe that program’s still turning, I’m not sure because I don’t watch TV much and never during the day. But the world is definitely turning, on its axis, around the sun. The sun has crossed the equator, and winter is turning to Spring in the Northern hemisphere. The moon is turning closer to the earth, closer than it's been in decades, and we will have a huge full moon on 19 March. I'll be watching it with Loren, and all those I love all over the world.

And so we are turning corners in our lives, turning the pages, turning from one chapter to another.

Now comes another turning. My Peace Corps service in Ukraine is nearing an end, whether here in the States or there. I am also turning another chapter altogether in my decision to move from Florida to Toledo after Peace Corps. I had no idea this would happen when I left St. Petersburg. Some turning, and I will be re-turning to the place where I raised a family, and where my family still lives.

Sometimes these turnings and changes are great and sometimes they feel terrible, I remarked to a PCV friend. “Yeah, but if we aren’t turning and changing, we aren’t alive,” the friend said smartly. Looks like I will have more turnings ahead. It’s inevitable. It’s how we deal with them that matters, as the sages tell us. It reminds me once again of the Byrds' great rendition of the great Pete Seeger song based on one of my favorite verses from Ecclesiastics:

To everything (turn, turn, turn),
There is a season (turn, turn, turn).
And a time for every purpose under Heaven.

Leo Marks and Beyond

The life that I have
Is all that I have
And the life that I have
Is yours.

The love that I have
Of the life that I have
Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have
A rest I shall have
Yet death will be but a pause
For the peace of my years
In the long green grass
Will be yours and yours and yours.
By Leo Marks

I first learned of Leo Marks when Chelsea Clinton and her husband chose this poem as part of their wedding ceremony. It contains lovely sentiments, which can be interpreted in different ways; it touches a deep chord. My interpretation is that “my life and my love are for those I love, forever.”

It’s a lovely poem for a wedding, but the strange thing is that it is also a nice poem for a funeral. A wedding and a funeral. The beginning of a new life and the end of life. It seems odd. But once I learned a little more about Leo Marks, maybe it’s not so odd after all.

Leo Marks was a cryptologist, someone who creates and breaks secret codes. He was the son of an antiquarian bookseller in London, according to my favorite source for this kind of information, Wikipedia. He was first introduced to cryptography when his father gave him a copy of Edgar Allan Poe's story, "The Gold Bug." This is one of Poe’s most bizarre short stories, as I remember it, but I can see why a budding young cryptologist would find it fascinating. Young Marks demonstrated his skill at code breaking by deciphering his father's secret price codes. What a shock that must have been! It was the beginning of a long and brilliant career.

His father, Benjamin Marks, was joint owner of the Marks & Co bookshop at 84 Charing Cross Road, which achieved international fame with the 1970 book of that title by New York writer Helene Hanff and the later plays and movie. I loved the movie. A wonderful story, literary and enchanting, of unrequited love.

As a teenager, Leo Marks earned pocket money by setting the notoriously difficult London Times cryptic crossword. He became a cryptographer during WWII, a story he tells in his autobiography, "Between Silk and Cyanide," a behind-the-scenes look at the agents and policymakers of Winston Churchill’s secret service agencies. I’ve put the book on my ever-growing reading list.

According to reviews of the autobiography, Marks had no trouble breaking codes, but he could not break through the red tape and competition among different intelligence agencies, the Services Research Bureau or SOE among them, to get them to adopt a new system of codes that he thought would save lives. Marks said he was not a soldier or an agent, but just someone trying to keep them alive. He was considered brilliant at his work and sent many agents into enemy lines in occupied Europe armed with secret codes and life-saving techniques. His book is about his valiant but unsuccessful struggle for a new system of codes (“silk codes”).

But the old system prevailed, and interestingly it was based on encoding poems, classical and contemporary, Marks own poems among them. What a fascinating subject this turned out to be. So Leo Marks wrote poems encoded with secret messages and secret knowledge that he hoped would save the lives of soldiers and secret agents working against Hitler.

Well, then, what does Leo Marks’ poem, “The Life that I have,” mean? What secrets are encoded in it? Intriguing! But we’ll probably never know.

It's amazing what you find out when you are exploring something of interest and branch out from there into new and unknown territory in the world of knowledge. It’s like what Mary Oliver said about living your life in “Wild Geese:’
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting--
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Life calls to you “like the wild geese, harsh and exciting.” I think Leo Marks would have liked this particular poem. And maybe could have used it to encode messages that would save lives.

Musings 2: Layers of Experience: Coming Full Circle

The awesome layers of rock, from different ages and eons, that make up the majestic Grand Canyon, are like the layers of experience that compose our lives.

Our lives are layers of experiences, one on top of the other, sometimes running parallel to each other, sometimes blending together. Being a Peace Corps Volunteer has created another layer. For someone in her 7th decade, that's a lot of layering. It's gets down to that AARP adage (attributed to Abraham Lincoln) about "adding life to your years, not years to your life."

My Peace Corps adventure comes on top of many other layers: growing up in Rochester, NY; going to Wheaton college near Boston; attending graduate school in Madison, Wisconsin; children and family life in Toledo; humanities work in Washington, DC and Florida; teaching American history and women’s history at the University of Toledo and at Eckerd College in St. Petersburg, Florida.

These layers of experience sometimes seemed connected, sometimes disconnected, even disjointed. They brought joy and sorrow, achievements and mistakes, and often a sense of contribution to community, like my teaching, civil rights, and family violence prevention work in Ohio and, in DC, serving as an elected Advisory Neighborhood Commissioner for my Dupont Circle neighborhood.

Now I am completing my Peace Corps service, and I will be moving back to Toledo, close to my children and grandchildren for the first time in 26 years. I never thought I’d return to Toledo. When I was away, returning seemed a remote possibility. It felt like going backwards. Now it feels right. I have come full circle: I will add another layer of experience on top of the others, with a renewed sense of purpose and meaning. I will return home, enriched by my Peace Corps experience.

Musings 1: Deus ex Machina

It was hard being yanked out of my site so quickly, and probably unnecessarily. These appointments in DC could have waited two months. I’m working on my attitude to try to turn this lemon into lemonade. I’m having trouble with this. My dear colleagues voted me the "Toughest PCV" in group 36, a special honor. But this has been one of the toughest changes yet. I only had two months to go. I could have prepared the English Club and other projects for my leaving, had a smoother transition to a new PCV, done some goal setting and planning for the future. Instead I was taken out in one fell swoop, like a deus ex machina on a theater stage. But this is not theater; it's real life. And that's what feels so bad.

The only good side to all this is that my daughter Elissa was here in DC and between appointments we explored Washington, a really great walking and touring city. On Saturday we spent several hours at the National Museum of the American Indian, an absolutely stunning museum, from its brilliant architecture to its fine exhibitions. It's a testiment to the persistence of cultures and the human spirit in the face of horrendous oppression and adversity. The American Indians, our first people, are still with us, working hard to preserve their cultures into the future, for all time. It's a lesson for the present.

Elissa has returned to Toledo and I remain here in DC, but my heart is in Starobelsk. I am not sure what’s coming next. More tests, more doctors' appointments, and then what? I am working on my attitude. I didn’t have to be booted out of Ukraine, as it were, but now I think it would be painful to return and have to go through all the goodbyes again. So I am taking it one day at a time. I am a working PCV until 18 May, no matter what happens. I was assured of this before I left Ukraine. Once a PCV always a PCV. That is the only comfort right now.

Happy 50th Birthday, Peace Corps!

Peace Corps' 50th anniversary logo. Below, my daughter Elissa next to a Kennedy poster in the lobby of Peace Corps Headquarters, Washington, DC.


“Peace requires the simple but powerful recognition that what we have in common as human beings is more important and crucial than what divides us.” Sargent Shriver, first director of the Peace Corps, 1961-1966

I feel blessed to be a part of the Peace Corps as a volunteer in Ukraine. It’s hard to believe that its 50th anniversary is here. I remember when it started in 1961, in the happy halcyon days of the Kennedys. Over 200,000 Americans have served in 139 countries since then. Today there are 8600 volunteers in 77 countries, serving our country in the cause of peace from the bottom up.

The world has changed since 1961 and so has the Peace Corps, for some people not fast enough, for others at a good-enough pace given the difficult process of transitions. We contemporary PCVs are not as isolated as the early volunteers, who didn't have the internet and cell phones and the technology that keeps us connected. Current PCVs wonder how our predecessors, the pioneers, did it in those early days; we are lucky we can stay in touch with loved ones. Also, we are working on a host of different issues, from agricultural development to AIDS/HIV education, information technology, non-governmental organization development, human rights and environmental protection. We are in villages, towns and cities around the globe, "a legacy of service that has become a significant part of America’s history and positive image abroad" (http://www.peacecorps.gov/).

Here is a listing of some of the Peace Corps' newest programs and projects (http://www.nationalpeacecorpsassociation.0rg/):

HIV/AIDS in Africa and the Caribbean
The Peace Corps has intensified its role in the global effort to fight HIV/AIDS by training all Volunteers in Africa as educators and advocates of HIV/AIDS prevention and education. Regardless of their primary project, all Volunteers are being equipped to play a role in addressing the multiple health, social, and economic problems related to the HIV/AIDS epidemic. Peace Corps programs in Botswana and Swaziland are devoted entirely to fighting the disease. In addition, efforts are expanding into the Caribbean, where more Volunteers are focusing efforts on combating HIV/AIDS.

Information Technology
Volunteers provide technical training and support to groups and organizations that want to make better use of information and communications technology. They introduce people to the computer as a tool to increase efficiency and communication and to "leap frog" stages of development. Volunteers teach basic computer literacy skills, (e.g. word-processing, spreadsheets, basic accounting software, Internet use, and webpage development) and they introduce host communities to e-commerce, distance learning, and geographic information systems.

Expanding Into New Countries- Africa Region
Since Ghana received the first Peace Corps Volunteers in 1961, more than 60,000 Americans have served in 46 African countries. The Peace Corps continues to enjoy strong cooperation and support from the people of Africa. At the end of fiscal year 2011, some 3,000 Volunteers and trainees will be on board, working in 25 countries. In 2003, the re-opening of the Chad, Botswana, and Swaziland programs poised the Africa region for substantial growth.

Europe, Mediterranean and Asia Region
More than 48,250 Volunteers have served in the Europe, Mediterranean, and Asia (EMA) region since 1961. EMA has well over 2,500 Volunteers and trainees working in 20 countries, most of which are undergoing rapid economic and social changes. Throughout the region, Volunteers work with governments, local organizations, and communities to provide needed technical expertise and promote cross-cultural understanding. Together, Volunteers and their counterparts work to address changing needs in agriculture, business, education, the environment, and health.

I would add to this description the work volunteers are doing in NIS countries, the Newly Independent States of the former Soviet Union. Volunteers work in all areas and on all issues relevant to the transitioning economic and political conditions of these former Soviet republics. It is transformative work at the local level, step by step. It is about getting to know these countries and their cultures, and about them getting to know about America. Where there were enemies, there are now friendships. Where there was fear and hate, there is now acceptance and tolerance.

Inter-America and Pacific Region
Since 1961, more than 73,000 Volunteers have served in the Inter-America and Pacific (IAP) region, in more than 46 countries. Today, more than 3000 Volunteers work in 24 posts in all six of the agency’s sectors: agriculture, business development, education, the environment, health and HIV/AIDS, and youth. The Fiji program was re-opened in 2003 and a program in Mexico opened for the first time in 2004.

Celebrations of the 50th anniversary are now taking place worldwide. We are celebrating in Ukraine, joining PCVs all over the globe. We hope the spirit of the Peace Corps infuses international affairs and diplomacy at the highest levels in this fast-changing world, where the yearning for freedom, self-determination and peace are driving popular protests, people's revolutions, and drastic social change.

Check out www.peacecorps.gov or the National Peace Corps Association website for more information and ongoing updates on what's happening where. Below is a list of agency-supported commemorative efforts. This calendar will be updated continually as events are confirmed:

January 3, 2011:Worldwide launch of the agency's 50th Anniversary Year Commemoration efforts including release of a commemorative poster created exclusively by a prominent American artist.

March 1, 2011: Worldwide launch of inaugural "Peace Corps Month"

March 2–4, 2011:Director Aaron Williams and Chris Matthews at UCLA, panel presentation and a film screening.

March 5, 2011: Kennedy Service Awards Ceremony, Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum in Boston, Mass.

March 17, 2011: National Archives and Records Administration panel discussion, Washington, D.C.

March 24, 2011: Director Williams will visit the University of Wisconsin-Madison.

April 2011: Congressional Community Event in Washington D.C.

May 18, 2011: Lillian Carter Awards Ceremony for Outstanding Senior RPCV, Carter Center in Atlanta, Ga.

June 30–July 11, 2011: Peace Corps will be a featured program at the Smithsonian Folklife Festival on the National Mall, Washington, D.C.

Summer 2011: Peace Corps will honor the departure of the first group of Volunteers to Ghana and Tanganyika (later called Tanzania) and passage of the historic congressional authorization of the Peace Corps in September 1961.

September 23, 2011: United States Institute of Peace panel discussion, Washington, D.C.